in high school
i wanted to feel like charlie did
in that tunnel
on a drive
with the people he loved most
in the world.
i wanted my life
to be like a coming-of-age film
where everything and nothing felt right
all at the same time.
i wanted to feel infinite.
but as we grow older
as our skin changes
as our hearts tire out
we learn that’s not real life.
no,
real life is filled
with heartbreak
with madness
with death
with unfairness.
it’s filled with fights
with people
you hold close.
it’s filled with music
playing
while you cry yourself to sleep
at 3 a.m.
because you’ve never felt so
alone.
it’s filled with the hardest
goodbyes
you never thought
would pass your lips.
it’s filled with watching your loved ones
wail out in pain
because they’ve lost someone they love.
yes,
real life is filled
with heartbreak
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