- Wake up on the right side of your bed. Apparently there is a wrong side, so the other one must be the right side.
- Better yet, don’t wake up. Sleep in all day. It’s fool proof. Not a thing can go wrong when you’re asleep.
- If you have been forced to wake up, start off with some yum grub. Food is the next best thing after sleep.
- Go on a long walk. Maybe even run. Running from your problems is a really effective way to stay happy. I’d know! I’ve been doing it for 19 years.
- Take a nice long shower while contemplating cruel ways to punish those who dare to annoy you.
- When you’re choosing what to wear, make sure your clothes are of idiot repellent fabric. If there are chances of a shower of stupidity in the daily forecast, you don’t want to get any on you.
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