Category Archives: Funny

Cockroaches Are Precocious, Poetry by C.P. Hickey

Genre: Funny

 

“Cockroaches Are Precocious”

By C.P. Hickey

 

I find cockroaches to be precocious.

 

Especially, those from Nacogdoches.

 

Scurry hurry, here and there.

 

On their backs, legs in the air.

 

 

Marvel at their quick precision,

 

Never in the same position.

 

Lights go on and full disperse,

 

Champion of the universe.

 

 

Evolution’s most refined,

 

With creepy crawlies of their kind.

 

There’s no sense to choose denial,

 

They are masters of survival.

 

 

You never know where they’ll be,

 

Behind the fridge, amidst laundry.

 

They have a sneaky super power,

 

I once found one in the shower.

 

As just as fast I’ll change my shtick

 

Here’s a thought to sit down with:

 

To the most unsuspecting palate,

 

Roaches make a great three-bean salad.

 

So don’t adhere to superstition,

 

High protein supports nutrition.

 

Listen to this noble truth,

 

We’ve all eaten a bug or two.

 

 

So next time when you make a face,

 

While snacking crunchy carapace,

 

Be sure to think of blooming roses,

 

And remember roaches are precocious.

 

 

Especially, those from Nacogdoches.

 

 

 

    * * * * *

Deadline: FREE POETRY Festival – Get your poem made into a MOVIE and seen by 1000s. Three options to submit:
http://www.wildsound.ca/poetrycontest.html

Watch Poetry performance readings:

Watch Poetry made into Movies:

The Pumpkin Beast. Poetry by Kathy Figueroa

Genre: Fear, Funny, Halloween*, October*

The Pumpkin Beast
by Kathy Figueroa

In the blackest hours of Halloween night
Stir creatures that moan and wail;
Such sounds can give a soul a fright
And cause your heart to fail!

But there’s one that makes the other bunch
Sound as innocent as a birdie’s chirp
When it goes CRUNCH, CRUNCH
MUNCH, MUNCH, SLURP, SLURP …BURP!!

“Oh, tell us, please, what is this beast?”
Hoarse, hushed whispers query,
“On what does this monster feast
And make noises that are so scary?”

Behold yon pumpkin, with an eerie face
Lit by a candle from within –
It’s to keep bad spirits from that place,
That’s why it has a hideous grin.

But people give nary a thought
That, inside, the pumpkin is being toasted…
The candle flame burns so hot
The pumpkin becomes roasted.

Certain epicureans of the quadruped kind
Esteem this squash “cuisine”
And, in abundance, it’s easy to find
On the night of Halloween.

There’s one with which I’m acquainted
That has a legendary appetite
And I nearly fainted
When I first saw the following sight:

Only scraps of rind lay on the floor –
The Pumpkin Beast had struck behind my back!!
…And he was still looking around for more
After his initial snack attack!

“El Perro Gordo de Paudash”
Is the name by which he’s now known
And he’ll choose pumpkin in a flash
Any day …instead of a bone!

    * * * * *

Deadline: FREE POETRY Festival – Get your poem made into a MOVIE and seen by 1000s. Three options to submit:
http://www.wildsound.ca/poetrycontest.html

Watch Poetry performance readings:

Watch Poetry made into Movies: