Category Archives: 1st scene script

HISTORY 1st Scene Screenplay – SANDS OF LANIKAI, by Greg Blair

 

Genre: Historical Fiction

Before the first bombs were dropped on December 7th, 1941, two men arrived at different moments on the windward side of the island–in Kailua/Lanikai. One was bent on discovery; the other on destruction.

CAST LIST:

William Sands: James Murray
Paul Sands: Nick Wicht
Narrator: Val Cole
Isamu Anzai: Dan Fox
Takahashi: Fabio Abreu
Healani Lewis: Cassandra Sirois

Get to know the writer:

 1. What is your screenplay about?

Before the first bombs were dropped on December 7th 1941, two men arrived at different moments on the windward side of O’ahu. One was bent on discovery… the other, on destruction.

2. What genres does your screenplay fall under?

Historical Fiction / Mystery Romance

3. Why should this screenplay be made into a movie?

Sands of Lanikai is the “what if” story of Paul Sands, a new arrival to the islands. Mystified by a sudden family tragedy and blindsided by an unforeseen coming of age romance, he unwittingly confronts an undercover intruder who could change it all. Set against the backdrop of beautiful and rustic Windward O’ahu during the days before and after the attacks on Pearl Harbor, Sands of Lanikai paints a vivid picture of historic times and historical personalities. It twists and turns through a time period we all think we know well… only to entice, charm and surprise.

4. How would you describe this script in two words?

Mystery Romance

5. What movie have you seen the most times in your life?

Saving Private Ryan

6. How long have you been working on this screenplay?

On and off, four years.

7. How many stories have you written?

Two

8. What is your favorite song? (Or, what song have you listened to the most times in your life?)

Wicked Games – Chris Isaak

9. What obstacles did you face to finish this screenplay?

Until a script is green lighted, do we ever really finish?

10. Apart from writing, what else are you passionate about?

Music

11. You entered your screenplay via FilmFreeway. What has been your experiences working with the submission platform site?

Similar to IMDB, but free.

12. What influenced you to enter the festival? What were your feelings on the initial feedback you received?

The festival’s guarantee of a thoughtful and insightful feedback to my script entry.

Responses received from the festival, including those on formatting, dialog and cinematic structure have been very insightful.

 

******

Producer: Matthew Toffolo http://www.matthewtoffolo.com

Director: Matthew Toffolo

Casting Director: Sean Ballantyne

Editor: Kimberly Villarruel

Camera Op: Mary Cox

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WATCH Mid-Year 1st SCENE SCREENPLAY Winners (January-June 2017)

Watch the Winning 1st SCENE Screenplay winners for the first half of 2017:

 

ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – GOOD INTENTIONS
June 2017 Reading
by Sandy Tovray Greenberg

ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – GRAVITY’S PULL
June 2017 Reading
by Robert Sivigny

ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – AVES
May 2017 Reading
by
ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – ROUND TRIP
May 2017 Reading
by Sherwin Allen

ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – TRISKEL
May 2017 Reading
by Brian K. Palmer
ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – SANDSTORM
April 2017 Reading
Written by Neil Chase

ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – PAST PRESENCE
April 2017 Reading
Written by Kevin Mongelli
ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – SPARKS
April 2017 Reading
Written by Jon Freda

ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – THE DEBT
April 2017 Reading
Written by Michelle Patkowski
ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – WELCOME TO ARCADIA
March 2017 Reading
Written by Jason Lan

ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – EVEN HERE I EXIST
March 2017 Reading
Written by Dylan Stump

ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – REARRANGING ROXY
March 2017 Reading
Written by Bridget Bell McMahon

ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – MONSTER MURDER MYSTERY
March 2017 Reading
Written by Arran McDermott

ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – THE COURIER
March 2017 Reading
Written by Michael Dambrosio

ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – BROKEN FRAME
February 2017 Reading
Written by Stephen Boncella
ACTOR1st SCENE Screenplay – EKKO
February 2017 Reading
Written by Johnny Walker

ACTOR1st SCENE Script – FAN SITE
January 2017 Reading
Written by Elisha Barnes
ACTOR1st SCENE Script – OCD
January 2017 Reading
Written by Quyen Tran

ACTOR1st SCENE Script – INT. CAR – NIGHT
January 2017 Reading
Written by Martin Keady

Festival Deadlines

writing CONTEST1st CHAPTER or FULL NOVEL CONTEST
Get full feedback! Winners get their novel made into a video!
SCREENPLAY CONTESTSUBMIT your FEATURE Script
FULL FEEDBACK on all entries. Get your script performed
TV CONTESTSUBMIT your TV PILOT or TV SPEC Script
Voted #1 TV Contest in North America.
FILM CONTESTSUBMIT your SHORT Film
Get it showcased at the FEEDBACK Festival

Quyen Tran – January 2017 1st Scene Screenplay Winner

Watch the January 2017 Winning 1st Scene Screenplay.

Best Scene from the screenplay OCD Screenplay
Written by Quyen TranCAST LIST:

NARRATOR – Julie Sheppard
VIKTOR – Hugh Ritchie
DR. NAVID – Robert Notman
GWEN – Olivia Jon

SYNOPSIS:

Genre: Drama, Romance

Two university lovers have an intense argument.

Get to know the writer:

What is your screenplay about?

OCD (working title) is about a young woman who begins to have dark obsessions after an HIV scare.

What genres does your screenplay fall under?

Drama, Dark-Comedy

Why should this screenplay be made into a movie?

The script is currently 231 pages so it could be either a TV mini-series or film series. OCD should be made because it’s
an untold story relevant to the Millennial age.

How would you describe this script in two words?

“Digital Loneliness”

What movie have you seen the most times in your life?

It’s a tie between The Santa Clause or Deathproof.

How long have you been working on this screenplay?

Almost a year now.

How many stories have you written?

I’ve written several short stories but this is my first full-length story.

What motivated you to write this screenplay?

Something happened to me a year ago that left me in a state of devastation and I began writing this. It was the only thing that
made me feel better.

What obstacles did you face to finish this screenplay?

A major obstacle was finding a quiet place to write. I live in a loud household. It’s hard to write when there is some annoying
noise going on. I’m still trying to find a quiet, private place. Mostly, I write at night when everyone is asleep. Headphones,
earplugs, and music/atmospheric sound help.

Apart from writing, what else are you passionate about?

I’m currently reading Les Miserables by Victor Hugo, which I had put off for years because it looked so long and boring.
But I’m so glad I started, because so far, it’s one of the best stories I’ve ever read.

What influenced you to enter the festival? What were your feelings on the initial feedback you received?

I had also just rewritten the first scene so it was kind of a sign for me. Also, I found a coupon code on Facebook.

The feedback was paramount to my script’s consistent progress. It really encouraged me as a new writer, because it’s rare to get encouragement when people think you’re in your room all the time doing nothing, and you’re actually writing.

****
Director/Producer: Matthew Toffolo

Casting Director: Sean Ballantyne

Editor: John Johnson


TV CONTESTSUBMIT your Best Scene Screenplay or TV SPEC Script
Voted #1 TV Contest in North America.
Screenplay CONTESTSUBMIT your Best Scene Screenplay or FEATURE Script
FULL FEEDBACK on all entries. Get your script performed
Screenplay CONTESTFIRST SCENE (first 10pgs) Screenplay CONTEST
Submit the first stages of your film and get full feedback!

Elisha Barnes – January 2017 1st Scene Screenplay Winner

Best Scene from the screenplay FAN SITE Screenplay
Written by Elisha BarnesCAST LIST:

NARRATOR – Sean Ballantyne
ASHLEIGH – Petra O’Toole
DANNI – Rachel Salsberg
JOAN – Georgia Grant
MAN – Craig Estrella

SYNOPSIS:

Genre: Comedy, Romance, Drama

Sexy lesbian Danni Montgomery lives in abstinence with her ex – an ex who still carries a torch. Meanwhile Danni is eyeing up a bisexual movie star and attempts to woo her by bulding her the hottest fan site on the web. After a series of successes and miscues, my story ends with an unlikely ending.


Get to know the winning writer:

1. What is your screenplay about?

Sexy lesbian Danni Montgomery lives in abstinence with her ex – an ex who still carries a torch. Meanwhile Danni is eyeing up a bisexual movie star and attempts to woo her by bulding her the hottest fan site on the web. After a series of successes and miscues, my story ends with an unlikely ending.

2. What genres does your screenplay fall under?

Rom-Com and dramedy

2. Why should this screenplay be made into a movie?

For one thing there is a dearth of movies about lesbians who aren’t criminals, psychos or prisoners. The women in my story lead everyday lives; never has a mainstream production company released a lesbian Rom-Com and the time is right for such a picture.

3. How would you describe this script in two words?

Funny & Sexy

4. What movie have you seen the most times in your life?

A tie between Wizard of Oz and Spinal Tap

5. How long have you been working on this screenplay?

Off-and-on two years

6. How many stories have you written?

Five screenplays (and am in the note-taking stage for my 6th), 14 short stories, two novels and one one-act stage play.
My screenplays are currently for sale on Amazon.com in case anyone is curious how they turned out. Just go to Amazon.com and put “Elisha Barnes” in the search field and up popd three.

7. What motivated you to write this screenplay?

Well, this is kind of embarrassing to admit but I once had a supercrush on a movie star and I thought if I built her a gee-whiz fan site she would contact me. She didn’t.

8. What obstacles did you face to finish this screenplay?

The feedback I received literally tore it apart and this is the 10th rewrite of the script.

9. Apart from writing, what else are you passionate about?

Going to the movies, Netflix, flea markets and garage sales and my two dogs, Pumpkin and Teak.

10. What influenced you to enter the festival? What were your feelings on the initial feedback you received?

I had such a positive experience with my first entry – She’s Driving Me CRazy (also for sale) – that I had to try again. I’ve been thrilled with the feedback even though I don’t agree with all of it, but that’s normal.

****
Director/Producer: Matthew Toffolo

Casting Director: Sean Ballantyne

Editor: John Johnson

TV CONTESTSUBMIT your Best Scene Screenplay or TV SPEC Script
Voted #1 TV Contest in North America.
Screenplay CONTESTSUBMIT your Best Scene Screenplay or FEATURE Script
FULL FEEDBACK on all entries. Get your script performed
Screenplay CONTESTFIRST SCENE (first 10pgs) Screenplay CONTEST
Submit the first stages of your film and get full feedback!

Martin Keady – January 2017 1st Scene Screenplay Winner

Watch the January 2017 Winning 1st Scene Screenplay.

Best Scene from the screenplay INT. CAR – NIGHT Screenplay
Written by Martin KeadyCAST LIST:NARRATOR – Julie Sheppard
PATRICK – Hugh Ritchie
YOUNG MAN – David Occhipinti

SYNOPSIS:

Genre: Drama, Thriller

A middle-aged accountant has to drive home from work because there is a tube strike. When he stops at a traffic light, a young man taps on his windscreen – with a gun – and orders him to let him in.

Get to know the writer:

What is your screenplay about?

The enforced meeting of absolute opposites, as a middle-aged accountant is carjacked by a crazed, gun-wielding drug addict.

What genres does your screenplay fall under?

Thriller and road movie.

Why should this screenplay be made into a movie?

Because (I hope!) it takes the viewer on the same mad, uncontrollable journey that the hero (the middle-aged accountant) is taken on.

How would you describe this script in two words?

Carjacking vérité.

What movie have you seen the most times in your life?

Withnail & I.

How long have you been working on this screenplay?

I must confess that this is one of the quickest scripts I have ever written – about a week, including a few all-nighters (fittingly, for a film about a carjacking that lasts a whole night).

How many stories have you written?

About 10 feature-length screenplays, including The Shakespeare Plays, a biopic of Shakespeare (http://theshakespeareplays.com/); about 20 to 30 short films; and about a further 10 stage plays and radio plays.

What motivated you to write this screenplay?

I was originally commissioned to adapt a novel about a carjacking that was so utterly unbelievable, implausible and plain atrocious that I just couldn’t do it. Instead, I was inspired to write an original screenplay about a REAL carjacking, which happened to a friend of mine and was utterly terrifying. She survived – just – and I thought that if I could take an audience on that journey I would have a great movie script.

What obstacles did you face to finish this screenplay?

Like all writers, a shortage of time. I was working during the day at the time, which is why I had to write it at night, which, of course, is the best time to write: no phone calls (or tweets, emails, etc.); no interruptions of any kind; and in addition your brain is naturally attuned to being halfway between sleep and waking, which is probably the best place to be as a writer.

Apart from writing, what else are you passionate about?

Shakespeare (hence the Shakespeare biopic); sport (especially football and tennis, which I write about for LastWordOnSports.com); and (writing about and thus fighting in my own small way) injustice!

What influenced you to enter the festival? What were your feelings on the initial feedback you received?

After years (indeed, decades) of hiding my light under a bushel, as it were, I am finally determined to get my writing “out there” – whatever the response (good or bad, but hopefully not indifferent). The most useful part of the feedback was a comment about the title, “INT. CAR. NIGHT.”, saying that it did not really “fit” the story, as it was “too meta”. I understand and appreciate that, which is why, having thought about it, I would now switch the title back to one of the original two titles I had – either just “CARJACK” or “HIT THE NORTH”, a title borrowed from a great Fall song and utterly fitting for this story.

****
Director/Producer: Matthew Toffolo

Casting Director: Sean Ballantyne

Editor: John Johnson


TV CONTESTSUBMIT your Best Scene Screenplay or TV SPEC Script
Voted #1 TV Contest in North America.
Screenplay CONTESTSUBMIT your Best Scene Screenplay or FEATURE Script
FULL FEEDBACK on all entries. Get your script performed
Screenplay CONTESTFIRST SCENE (first 10pgs) Screenplay CONTEST
Submit the first stages of your film and get full feedback!

Myke J Friscia – December 2016 SHORT Screenplay Winner

BLOOD DRIVE
Written by Myke Friscia

CAST LIST:

NARRATOR – Sean Ballantyne
SIMON – Chris Reid Geisler
JACKIE – Angela Cavallin
HUMAN RESOURCES – Dana Thody
BOSS – Brian Carleton
LAWYER – Ucal Shillingford
DOG – Noah Casey

SYNOPSIS:

Genre: Thriller, Crime, Horror

A man’s life spirals out of control when he becomes obsessed with meeting the woman behind the voice of his car navigation system.

Get to know the winning writer:

1. What is your screenplay about?

Things go terribly awry for a man who becomes obsessed with meeting the woman behind the voice of his car navigation system.

2. What genres does your screenplay fall under?

A dark comedy, Twilight Zone-like thriller

2. Why should this screenplay be made into a movie?

It is unique in that it is a SOLO actor performance. The outside world exists only as voices heard, but not seen. Being that, it can be made on an extremely low budget. It’s darkly funny, thrilling and entertaining for an audience for beginning to end. It is a challanging and fun role for an actor. It’s based on a situation where millineal technology backfires in way that could possibly happen to anyone.

3. How would you describe this script in two words?

Quirky. Thrilling.

4. What movie have you seen the most times in your life?

The original Star Wars!

5. How long have you been working on this screenplay?

About a year and a half on and off.

6. How many stories have you written?

10 Features, 3 original TV pilots, 10 shorts.

7. What motivated you to write this screenplay?

A story I read that something similar happened. I thought it was a great premise for a story that was based on reality. I also tried to come up with something easily producable.

8. What obstacles did you face to finish this screenplay?

For contest purposes, trying to keep the whole story under 30 pages while keeping it entertaining, while at the same time developing the characters. Also trying to write it in such a way that only one physical actor was needed for the whole story, which was very challanging in itself.

9. Apart from writing, what else are you passionate about?

I love movies! But also am passionate about baseball, Texas Hold’em and getting involved with my daughter’s school activities.

10. Any advice or tips you’d like to pass on to other writers?

Keep learning about your craft and never stop. Try every means available to get your work out there, all the while just keep writing and writing. Write what you know best. Experiment with different genres, concepts, story lengths and formats. Never give up!

TV CONTESTSUBMIT your Short Screenplay or TV SPEC Script
Voted #1 TV Contest in North America.
SCREENPLAY CONTESTSUBMIT your Short Screenplay or FEATURE Script
FULL FEEDBACK on all entries. Get your script performed
SCREENPLAY CONTESTFIRST SCENE (first 10pgs) SCREENPLAY CONTEST
Submit the first stages of your film and get full feedback!

Ambert Epling – December 2016 1st Scene Screenplay Winner

Watch the December 2016 Winning 1st Scene Screenplay.

UNSPOKEN
Written by Amber Epling

CAST LIST:

NARRATOR – Sean Ballantyne
GABRIEL – Craig Estrella
CELESTE – Rachel Salsberg
DOCTOR WATERS – Georgia Grant
RUSS – Charles Gordon

SYNOPSIS:

Genre: Drama, Mystery

Celeste Grey, a mentally-challenged 20-something girl, who has no ability to speak escapes from an institution after being raped by an associate of the institute. By fate, she ends up on a ranch with 50-something RUSS, whose wife had been institutionalized before committing suicide, and his handsome, self-centered adult son (GABE).

Get to know the winning writer:

1. What is your screenplay about?

Unspoken is about a young woman who is mentally disabled and she finds her way to a ranch, where a man and his son take her in and care for her and her soon to be unborn child. While they are trying to hang onto their ranch, they come to realize that, while they thought they were helping her, she actually winds up helping them.

2. What genres does your screenplay fall under?

The genre is a drama.

2. Why should this screenplay be made into a movie?

This movie is very inspiring to a lot of people in this world. This woman who is lost, alone, deaf and is pregnant has no hope in the world. The hope she finds is in two people who would be the most unlikely candidates to take care of her. It goes to show that just because people have disabilities and can’t speak for themselves doesn’t mean that they are voiceless and that they don’t have a heart. They just might be the ones to save you, not the other way around.

3. How would you describe this script in two words?

Dramatic and Uplifting

4. What movie have you seen the most times in your life?

The Man In The Iron Mask and The American President

5. How long have you been working on this screenplay?

This film has been completed for several years now, just waiting for the right opportunity.

6. How many stories have you written?

Over the course of 15 years I have written 20 films.

7. What motivated you to write this screenplay?

This story came about in regards to a family member who suffered a tragedy that resulted in her having extreme handicaps after giving birth to her second daughter. She can’t speak, she can’t feed herself or walk, but she is bright and very intelligent. She still has her mind and uses it to communicate to her family by using a letter board. Much like the main character, she suffers deafness and has to be treated much like a child. That is kind of what brought the story to a head.

8. What obstacles did you face to finish this screenplay?

The only obstacles that I faced while writing this, was the obstacles that I have faced with all of my films. I have been trying my best to get my work publicized and at times I felt like I was in a stalemate and that my films could never make it, but I realized that I was good enough and I knew this was a film that had a great message and it needed to be told, so I finished it. Along with the personal story that comes along with this story, I knew I had to do this, so I gathered all my courage and strength and told myself that this was one that will mean the most.

9. Apart from writing, what else are you passionate about?

Photography

10. What influenced you to enter the festival? What were your feelings on the initial feedback you received?

I was on Twitter and the account for the festival came up and I checked it out and decided to give it a try.


TV CONTESTSUBMIT your Best Scene Screenplay or TV SPEC Script
Voted #1 TV Contest in North America.
SCREENPLAY CONTESTSUBMIT your Best Scene Screenplay or FEATURE Script
FULL FEEDBACK on all entries. Get your script performed
SCREENPLAY CONTESTFIRST SCENE (first 10pgs) SCREENPLAY CONTEST
Submit the first stages of your film and get full feedback!

****
Director/Producer: Matthew Toffolo http://www.matthewtoffolo.com

Editor: John Johnson

Casting Director: Sean Ballantyne